Nutastrophe

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Nutastrophe

Caroline, Staff Writer

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Sure, the autumn leaves are pretty and the skies are (almost) always blue, but these beautiful things are hiding an ugly secret (insert dramatic music)- ACORNS!

For example, you just made the biggest leaf pile EVER. It is so big, you post it on Instagram and send emails to everyone calling them to come over to your house because it’s going to take more than one person to jump in this monster pile.

Everyone lines up and jumps on the count of three.

Then, it happens. Your baby sister starts wailing.

At first you assume that it’s just your baby sister being, well, a baby. Then, you spot them. Hundreds of fallen acorns and those peanuts that your mom spilled just this morning, and your sister just happened to land in them!

That’s not all!  Just this morning you were taking your pet (pick : fish, cat, dog ,elephant) on a walk, whistling the sonata from Bach you just cannot get off your mind, when an acorn fell on your head! Not only did it hurt, but you were just getting to your favorite part of the song. It made you whistle an A-flat instead of an A-sharp!

But, there is hope!

According to me, these are some ways to avoid the endless acorn struggle:

  • Bring an umbrella wherever you go (better safe than sorry, no?)
  • NEVER wear any shoes that expose your feet
  • Politely ask the trees to please stop dropping the nuts on your head
  • Get your own personal squirrel to gather all the nuts
  • Form a treaty with the trees and an alliance with the squirrels

…and if all else fails, don’t go outside at all and enjoy the leaves and sky from your window sill!  It’s a dangerous world out there. Stay safe!

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